One of the best short explanations of how the human shadow works comes from Robert Bly, in A Little Book on the Human Shadow:

The brighter the light, the darker the shadow.

Short and sweet.

I love it because the outer-world metaphor — that is exactly how light effects shadow in the physical world — synchs up so perfectly with the inner-world experience. The greatest evils are often performed by people who are perfectly sure of their righteousness. The brighter the light, the darker the shadow.

A nice, sweet, calm, intelligent person is just as busy as any of the rest of us building up a mean, rude, stupid, violent inner-personality (usually well hidden in that person’s shadow) who manages to get loose and pop out at weird times, in weird ways, and is capable of inflicting real damage to others. “I don’t know what came over me!” And no time of year stokes and provokes the stupid-shadow-self in each one of us more than Christmas time.

That’s because, on the surface, everything is sugar-coated in December. We glorify peace and love and kindness – there’s nothing the shadow hates worse – in songs and cards and decorations and syrupy TV shows, while using cut-throat competition, below-living wages, environmental degradation, and political power plays to get things done.

To bring it right down to the minute, try listening to what runs through your head for an hour or two during the Christmas season. Is it peaceful? Is it full of good will toward men? Not so much. Hhmph. Who knows if ‘peace on earth’ or ‘good will toward men’ is even possible? Looking at history or current events, you’d have to say those are strange concepts for our particular species to be singing about.

And most of our family situations are so at odds with the sweetness of commercial Christmas, too. It’s destabilizing. We forget that neither Norman Rockwell’s or Currier & Ives’ paintings were pictures of real life.

So before we go any further let’s stop and remind ourselves that Christmas is not going to come off flawlessly this year. That we will not get everything we wanted. That we’re liable to stress ourselves out buying things we know we can’t afford, or trying to find time to make cookies we shouldn’t actually eat. That none of our relatives will be as likable as Jimmy Stewart or Donna Reed.

Hell! Even Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed weren’t that nice. They were playing characters in a movie. Entitled: “It’s A Wonderful Life.” Sheesh.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
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